The stories are true. Florida is the weirdest place on the planet. And there are so many things that can kill you here – besides Covid. Like reptiles, snakes and insects. Up North, when I pass those perfect suburban lawns with the little pesticide application flags in them, I think "You selfish son of a bitch. Poisoning our ecology, ground water and pets so you can have your little putting green out here." In Florida, when I see one of those little flags, I think "hmm, might be time for another application?"
But Florida is kind of like that crazy girlfriend in high school – she's crazy, but also crazy hot. You know you should break up with her, but something keeps dragging you back. To wit – she’s hot. And while she can be weird, it's often weird in a fun way, if not in a good way. And, so it goes. Pelicans, gators, nail salons, rum runners, ambulance chasers, beer chasers, sunshine, swamps, scoundrels, screwballs, and shenanigans.
I'll be staying on.